I'm a traveler!

I joined Chuck at the bar after I finished closing down for the night. Chuck looked like a middle aged Horatio Sanz and sounded like a bad impression of Harry Caray. "Mike! Want a tequila shot?"
"Sure" I said. I liked drinking with Chuck, it was always an interesting experience.

The Wine Bar was located in a charming spot, right next to a Subway sandwich shop and a pick up bar for people forty plus. The lights of the Wine Bar were off me and Chuck watched the elderly bar scene file down the street. We heard the door open and watched a woman in her late fifties stumbled in wearing a strapless, form fitting, Hawaiian printed dress.

Chuck took about three seconds to pounce on his prey.

"Hey baby, hey baby, how are you." Chuck slurred.
"Is this place open?" the woman said.
"Only for VIP's my dear. Why don't you come sit down by your new friend Chuck?"
"This place is open, right? I don't want to get in any trouble." The woman was about as drunk as I've ever seen a human being.
Chuck had one eye open now and I was pretty sure that he was about to pass out mid pick up line. "Sit down by Chuck and have a drink, beautiful."

The lady whispered in my ear, "I don't have any money."
"I think Chuck's taking care of the drinks tonight." I said.
"Hey Mike! Grab the lady a corona, she looks like a corona type of girl."
I went behind the bar grabbed another round for all of us. The woman sat at the bar and Chuck tried to woo her.
"So, what do you do?" the woman asked.
"I'm a traveler!" Chuck said, "I travel all over, that's what I do."
"A traveler?"
"I'm the district manager for Applebee's." At this point, Chuck was drinking brandy from a snifter about the size of his huge head. "It's a job though, I don't care for the food. I don't care for it, but I get to do what I want in this world."
The woman finished her beer and started to get a worried look in her eyes. "I've got to go, thank you for the drink, I have to go."
Before the woman made it out of the bar Chuck started to scream in his usual way. "That bitch, they all take free drinks and act like bitches! Fuck this place Mike, let's go to the strip club. Come on! Let's get out of this shit hole."
To put it in perspective, it was 2 a.m., the nearest strip club was at least and hour away and we were both hammered. So we did what anyone would have done, Chuck rented a limo and we drove into the darkness on our way to have a little fun.

We talked and laughed down the highway, throwing our empty beer bottles out the window.

We got to the strip club with ten minutes until close and a dream in our heart.

"We only got a few minutes!" I heard Chuck say as he barreled through the strip club and grabbed the first girl he could. "Hey baby, wanna go to the champagne room with us?" Chuck turned to me and said, "Come on Mike, this is gonna be awesome!"

I wish I could say it was. I had a whiskey headache that was starting on in base of my brain, and believe it or not when a drunk, sweaty, Horatio Sanz look-a-like is sitting next to you in the champagne room, it can hinder the lap dance experience just a tad...

At this point, I was weaving in between consciousness anyway. Blurry vision, a pounding headache, a stripper from western Kansas, all while a drunk Horatio was leading the way, it should have been a blast.

We were the only people left in the club, there was nothing but bouncers and strippers counting tips in corner. The party at the strip club was over now and it was time to leave. The last thing I remember was trying to open the front door and puking as I hit the ground.

Somehow, I woke up the next morning. I had no idea how I got home, I didn't even care, all I cared about was getting over the massive hangover. My hands were shaking as I put on my chef's coat and as I walked to my car I hoped that Chuck would stop by the restaurant again.